Monday, December 15, 2014

OMG! Perfect Winter Natural Hair Mask! Thanks Laila!

Remember,  the Bentonite clay and apple cider vinegar can be used as a facial mask as well. Do try! You won't be disappointed!

Sunday, December 14, 2014

How to Overcome a Wave of Rejection

Recently I got hit hard with rejection, and as a result, I began to doubt everything I was doing. I was thrown into total confusion, so much so, that it kept me awake at night. I didn't know what I wanted, and I couldn't move forward with my plans. It was crazy, and it was all my fault. I began to share my dreams, goals, and plans with certain people I believed would instantly support me. I was wrong, and then I became so overwhelmed by their negative reaction, I didn't want to move forward with my plans.

However, as I went about doing my daily activities the weeks that followed, I sensed a small voice urging me, "Don't give up!" When the nagging voice became louder and louder, I realized it must be God's voice telling me to keep my dreams alive.

I listened, and I continued to write and edit. I continued to complete a book project I started. I continued writing down my plans for 2015. I couldn't believe how hard it was. . .to get over a hurdle of self doubt that crept in from people I truly admired. I asked myself, "Why did you allow them to slow your progress? What happened?"

I told my daughter what happened, and she gave me even more confirmation. She said, "Why are you looking for others to approve of something you believe God told you to do. Just do it! Look to Him to help you." I was like, "Did you just say that?"  Wow.

The moral of the story is, even if you have someone on your side, someone you always look to for approval and advice. If they do not approve of something you know is right for you, keep it moving respectfully. Keep going with what you know is right for you. That doesn't mean you don't respect them or their advice. You just have to stay on track with what you know in your heart is right. I'm not saying you shouldn't listen to anyone or get advice or help from anyone, just do not ignore the small voice deep inside of you. If something someone says disagrees with that voice, you have to ignore that and go with the small voice. That voice is God nudging you to take a certain path that is designed specifically for you. Many people may not understand it, and that's okay. Refuse to allow anyone to rain on your internal parade.


Sunday, December 7, 2014

Happy Monday!

From playing around with my daughter, to being Foxy Brown, to just being me at work. . .all I have to say is . . .you gotta make the most of the work week.  It's Monday again ya'll. . .enjoy!

Thursday, December 4, 2014

Random Info: Preparing Natural Hair for a Work Out/ Facial Mask

From a naturalista I subscribed to . . . she gives good ideas ya'll! So here is a video in which she is preparing her hair before she works out. She also is doing a Bentonite clay (skin) mask. I do a similar mask, but sometimes I use red clay or Rhassoul clay and apple cider vinegar only. Or I will just use Bentonite clay and apple cider vinegar (I get all of these items from the local Herb Shop). Just food 4 Thought on this dreary Thursday. 


Wednesday, November 12, 2014

Much Obliged (A Natural Hair Story)

My wholeness journey began with my natural hair journey, which started in 2003. I noticed a huge bald spot in the back of my head—right in the center. When I saw it, I began to panic because I thought I was seeing the beginning stages of alopecia, which runs in my family.  I cried and prayed on the floor. And suddenly deep inside, I heard a small, still voice say that my hair would not fall out, but it would grow back healthy if I would began to take good care of it, and my entire body.

I set out to follow the voice, and now I believe it was God telling me to take better care of myself. I decided to stop putting heat or harsh chemicals on my hair. However, as I was making plans to do these things, fear began to rise within me. I realized I wasn’t ready for the emotional part of embracing my natural coils. I went from being peaceful about the decision to being afraid of what people would think when I cut off the relaxed part of my hair. I was about to sport a tiny afro, but I decided to simply get a texturizer instead, because a curly, short afro was easier to handle emotionally. 

But the thinning problem got worse. I knew I was going to have to ditch the harsh chemicals altogether. I was also using harsh dyes to keep my hair as dark as possible. It took six whole years to go completely natural, using no chemicals on my hair at all. Slowly but surely, I embraced my natural hair journey, researching and experimenting with foods, drinks, nutrients, vitamins, and natural products. While doing that, I bumped into products that would keep my skin, and my entire body glowing and much healthier. What started out as a natural hair journey eventually transformed into a “taking better care of  me” journey.  

In 2009, I was on YouTube constantly, taking notes with the same fervor as an eager college student. The ladies on YouTube (and natural hair blogs) became my professors as they carefully researched, defined, and demonstrated how to nourish black natural hair. I learned about the various oils that are best for tightly coiled curls. And that satin and silk scarves help prevent breakage while sleeping. I learned that instead of drying my hair with a towel, it is best to use a dry T-shirt. I also learned that Shea butter and Shea butter products worked wonders for my kinky, coily curls.

The bald spot incident is what made me spring into action. But little did I know, by embracing a natural hair journey, I would become healthier than I’ve ever been. Just a little food for thought—I guess I just want to say thanks! I thank God and all the beautifully natural sistas who helped me reached this wonderful place in my life (Naptural85, CurlyNikki, NikkiMae, FusionofCultures, Alicia James, and many more). Love you much and much obliged (tears). 

Wednesday, November 5, 2014

Journey to Wholeness

In my journey to wholeness after many abusive relationships, I started saying confessions from Scripture to transform my heart and mind concerning who I am as a single Christian woman. It was hard because I was always blaming someone else for my mistakes and failures, remaining a victim instead of taking the power that was available to me through God’s Word. Many people I talked to about my healing journey say my method “doesn’t work for them.” I always say, “Well whatever works for you, do it. But this is what works for me, so be it.” For me and my house, the Word works, so I try to confess something from Scripture over myself every single day. Here are some self love confessions I spoke over myself when I realized I was settling for one abusive relationship after another because I didn’t love myself.   

Self Love Confessions
Father, your workmanship is marvelous and how well I know it. You made all my delicate, inner parts and knit me together in my mother womb (Psalm 139, AMP).

You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb. I was curiously wrought as if embroidered with various colors. Before I had lived a day, you saw all the days of my life! Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! (Psalm 139, AMP)
Where can I go from your Spirit! If I go up to Heaven’s gates, you are there; if I make my bed in hell you would be there also. You know when I’m sitting or going. You know the words I will say before I say them! You know my thoughts even before I think them! (Psalm 139, AMP)

Lord, you sent your Son to die for me. Therefore, I know that you love me. I love you because you first loved me. Without you, and your love, I wouldn’t even know how to love myself! You teach me how to love; and Jesus is the ultimate expression of your love for me! I thank you that I am accepted by you because of Jesus. I am accepted in the Beloved! (John 3:16).

Psalm 8:3-5 says, “When I look at the night sky and see the work of your fingers—the moon and stars that you set in place—what are mere mortals that you should think about them, human beings that you should care for them. Yet you made them only a little lower than God and crowned them with glory and honor” (New Living Translation).  

Who am I that you are mindful of me! You made me a little lower than Elohim and gave me dominion over all the earth! You made me in your image!

Every single day you express your love for me. Your tender mercies toward me are new every morning (Lamentations 3:22, 23).

How precious and weighty are your thoughts about me. They are so very numerous they outnumber the sand! And the very hairs on my head are numbered by you! Because you love me so, you have given me the grace and the ability to love myself and others. Thank you for helping me to experience the depths of your love so that I can properly love myself and others (Psalm 139, AMP, Luke 12:7). 

Tuesday, October 28, 2014

It's a Girl Thing

I promised that before this month ended I was going to place on my blog some quotes about self love simply to acknowledge domestic violence against women this month. However, I found a video by an awesome young and fresh naturalista (I've subscribed to her channel for years) named Laila. I couldn't help but to post her video, after seeing how she connected her natural hair videos to such an amazing cause for women all over the globe. Kudos to Laila for getting our attention about the many issues that affect women all over the world. We love you girl! Anyhoo, please feel inspired to use whatever avenue you can to promote and spread the message. #it'sagirlthing

Friday, September 26, 2014

Squashing the Giants in Life

A keeper as far as quotes. . .
 “Ah, great it is to believe the dream as we stand in youth by the starry steam; but a greater thing is to fight life through and say at the end, the dream is true!”
-Edwin Markham quotes (American Poet He is best known for his poem of social protest, 1852-1940). 

One huge lesson I've learned this week, after going through some weird challenges and difficulties, is this—you cannot allow bad days or weeks or years . . .to swallow up your dreams. Bad days will come, but if you always allow those days to steer you away from your dreams and goals, you’ll never accomplish them. We have to keep the faith, and keep looking toward what we believe God wants us to do. We have to continue to believe we have a purpose, and that there is purpose in even the worst of circumstances. If you are stuck in a discouraging season in your life, I want to encourage you that most people (no matter how glamorous they seem) go through the exact same thing. However, the most successful of us, learn to be conquerors in the midst of life’s storms. We shake it all off. I know I'm preaching to the choir here, but it has to be said. 

For instance, I was working on some writing projects for myself, and this week after I had some crazy challenges, I almost allowed those things to stop me from finishing what I had started. However, by God's grace I continued. I'm doing those things I'm passionate about such as ministering to others and writing. I'm not going to allow these things to stop me from doing “good” to overcome all the evil in the world. I have been so determined this week to encourage people even though I didn’t feel encouraged myself.

My determination worked. Once I saw I’d made someone’s day, I got an amazing boost. I felt like a giant . . . or rather like I’d just killed a giant. In actuality, I did. I killed a challenge that was trying to steal my dreams and destiny. That's just my little food for thought . . . if you are having or have had a truly crappy week. Tonight, I urge you to keep your dreams alive despite obstacles and craziness. Use your gifts, skills, talents, kind heart, etc. to be a blessing to others. Squash the giants in your life, and look good doing it. :-)

Much love,

Wednesday, September 17, 2014

Lessons on Self Love

I remember when I visited a women’s domestic violence support group. I was single at the time, and I wasn’t in any domestic violence situation. However, I knew the facilitator because she had shared a lot of information with me about abusive relationships. She was really passionate about the subject. She has helped many women understand their value after they had endured many years of abuse. She told me that she knew it was her calling to do so. When we met, I had been in many abusive relationships myself. She helped me to gather information on the subject, and counseled me concerning a recent break-up I had gone through. She had been counseling abused women for decades. 

I visited the women’s group on a really cold, rainy Monday night near the holidays. I remember walking in slowly, not knowing what to expect. The house was warm and cozy. The facilitator brought out chocolates and other refreshments and proceeded to introduce me to the group. 

As we became more comfortable with each other, the ladies started to share. And I shared my story, surprisingly. Afterward, the facilitator brought out free gifts—free beauty products! We all had just visited such a dark place in our lives, but at the mention of beauty products, our spirits were ignited. We were giddy like little girls again, as we tried on lipstick, lotions, and perfume. Although I felt like a five-year-old, playing in her mother’s make-up, I was learning a profound lesson. It doesn’t take much to lift a dreadful mood. I couldn’t help but to laugh as the ladies came alive! All memories of their troubled past vanished right before my eyes, if only for a few glamorous moments. It lifted my spirit to see the great shift from feelings of sadness and regret to excitement and fun.

From that experience, I learned it’s important for us to feel good about ourselves.  Even if the feeling initially comes from a little dab of perfume or a little rouge on the lips, it’s all the same—self love and appreciation are important for those who are broken inside.

The other day, I thought about the ladies, and once again, I was inspired by the event. I decided to give myself a little boost by trying this electric blue eye liner. It wasn’t much, but it was a small step. It was a step toward a foundation I was already building in my life—I can set my perspective. I can change the course of my life no matter what is going on. Just a little food for thought . . . it’s always okay to show yourself some love. Next month is Domestic Violence Awareness month. I am planning to post some self love/self worth quotes in honor of the month.

Much love,